A Miraculous Day

A Miraculous Day Amidst the Scorching Heat

When it's hot, you get exhausted; when you're exhausted, you look for a cool place. In my youth, dragging heavy marble and a breathless, stifling underground through the scorching heat, gasping for air while doing backbreaking manual labor just so I wouldn't lose my dreams... dragging my tired body, skipping dinner, staring fixedly at a computer monitor with aching limbs and sleepy eyes...

Now, past fifty-seven, what remains is tens of millions of won in debt, a broken body, and a shattered self-esteem...

..

Yet, even today, I endlessly agonize over finding the right scenery on the canvas and paint the overwhelming emotions with the tip of my brush.

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As someone once said, "What is life, really?" "What is a big deal, aside from life and death?" What is life, after all?

Struggling and striving through it all, now looking ahead to my sixties in just a few years... .. For the past 20 years, without missing a single day, I clung to it because I so desperately wanted to paint...

.. ..

Along the way, somehow, I ended up holding several solo exhibitions and being active in a landscape painters association...

.. Anyway, I am now so addicted to plein air painting that I can't go a single day without heading outside.



.. . . Economic poverty ㅡ Well... .. No matter the country, isn't the life of a painter harsh and poor? But nobody can deny that the life of a painter in South Korea, having gone through a turbulent history, collapses into a cycle of poverty so brutal you'd rather not imagine it. . . . What's the use of becoming a master after you die? . . Needless to say, rather than becoming a Van Gogh after death, becoming a Monet, Picasso, or Dali while still alive is much more realistic and desirable.

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As three days of September pass by, even this sweltering summer gives way to a much cooler breeze.

Life must be like that, too. One day, when I can no longer paint, this winding life of twists and turns will also come to an end...

.. .. Today, I am still painting, and tomorrow, I will still be painting. .. .. Wondering what it all means... .. .. Meaning is just a matter of how you look at it, isn't it.. .. ..

Thinking of the rest of my life as a form of spiritual cultivation while I paint doesn't seem like a bad idea at all. . . 

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What is life, anyway..






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